Hi Everyone..There were so many times that I almost turned around came home because I was really scared. So I promised myself that if I went to the event and was nude I could have cheesesteaks for dinner every night this week if I so desired. Cheesesteaks speak to me. LOL
I finally arrived at the swim and nerves set in. But I triumphed and walked in the door. The people at the desk were really nice. I told them it was my first time and they were really warm and helpful. They pointed me towards the locker rooms and off I went. A kind young man was behind me as I walked in and we got to talking. Seeing the men's room door I told him that his locker room was there. A man passing by noted "This is a nudist event- the locker rooms are co-ed." So the guy went into the women's locker room with me. There were lots of other men there but I didn't see any women. Go figure.
The moment of truth had arrived: time to take off my clothes. The guy near me, named Devon, started disrobing like it was the most natural thing in the world. So, with heart beating loudly enough that you probably all heard it, I did likewise. It was soooo weird to be taking off my clothes in front of a guy! I mean, this guy that I had never met was seeing my underwear! But, I did it!
Well, I was nude. And nervous. But I had to keep going. Devon and I went to the pool together and I hopped in. Now THAT was an experience. I was overwhelmed with some kind of body feeling but I wasn't sure what in the world it was or even if it was good or bad. I just knew it was incredibly POWERFUL. I can tell you now- after talking with a nudist friend- that it was called sensuality and that it was a very good thing!
From the pool we hit the hot tub, had some pizza, and talked to some people. I met a few men who were really WEIRD, but I also met 2 young couples who were incredibly nice. During the evening I also got to play some volleyball, which is VERY fun for me though I'm not too good at it.
There was soooo much that I didn't expect. First off, I never did forget- even for a minute- that I was nude. Maybe this is just because of my life experiences. Also, I was surprised to see soooo few women there. I mean, I know that there are more male nudists than female, but I was still surprised about the ratio (seemed to be around 10:1 male to female.) This kind of made me uncomfortable. In my 'research' before going I did look at nude pictures of women, just to know what women were supposed to look like and to see if I looked 'right.' But I never thought to look for male pictures, so I didn't really know what men look like without clothes. That, in and of itself, was an experience. Even had I known what men look like, I think the ratio would have scared me a bit just because of who I am and my experiences with men in the past. Not that I'm saying that there should be mandatory gender-balancing at nudist functions, I'm just saying how I felt, ok?
The one big positive of the event was a body-image thing. While there and even now I really feel confident in my body- my body is normal and ok. It helped that I've lost 17 pounds since August 1, but seeing other nude women helped me to see that my body is actually decent and normal. This was a HUGE breakthrough for me. And I don't know that there is any other way that I could have come to this realization.
I had a rough ride home- very tearful and I couldn't understand why. I still don't know what's wrong. It's been a hard couple of days for me... there are a lot of feelings going on related to the swim and I can't identify or describe them. I'm hopeful that I'll be ok again soon.
So... will I go back? I dunno. I never did get to the point of feeling comfortable, but I the sensations of the pool while nude are pretty powerful and invite me back.